Airport Security Officers Are Laughing At Your Naked Body… And Other News

TSA Makes Fun of your Body

A former US airport security worker has revealed the TSA’s biggest secret: they make fun of images from full-body scanners.

Judging from the looks of the TSA officers I’ve seen, they shouldn’t be laughing at anyone’s body – but whatever gets you through the work day. In a candid confession, former TSA officer Jason Harrington said “The [full-body scanners] were good at detecting just about everything besides cleverly hidden explosives and guns.” Well that’s resassuring… but there’s more: “Many of the images we gawked at were of overweight people, their every fold and dimple on full awful display. Piercings of every kind were visible. Hernias appeared as bulging, blistery growths in the crotch area,” Harrington said. He also admitted that passengers were profiled based on their nationality and TSA officers often drank confiscated a bottle of alcohols. No surprise there. Sydney Morning Herald

Shirley TempleProving that not all child stars succumb to drug overdoses at young ages, Shirley Temple has passed away from natural causes at the age of 85. The curly haired little girl gained fame in the 1930s as a precocious young movie star who sang and danced away everyone’s painful memories of the Great Depression. Temple also proved that even the sweetest seeming child can grow up to be a Republican politician. After retiring her acting career, America’s sweetheart became active in politics and held several diplomatic posts in Republican administrations. CBC News

Trump WindfarmScottish Windfarm, 1. Donald Trump, 0. A Scottish civil court has ruled against Donald Trump in his lawsuit to prevent an experimental windfarm from being built in the proximity of his golf course in Aberdeenshire. Donald pushing hard against the windfarm, arguing that it would be an eyesore to golfers and it might suck up his combover.  The property developer/hair model also alleged that Alex Salmond, Scotland’s first minister, had secretly interfered in the decision to approve the offshore wind deployment centre site – a claim rejected by the judge. Of course, Trump plans to appeal the decision until he gets his way. The Guardian 

Taliban Dog HostageNow they’ve done it! The Taliban have really crossed the line this time. A military working dog has been captured by the Taliban and appears in his own prisoner of war video. Militants said they took the poor pup from American forces in the Alin Nigar district of Afghanistan’s Laghman province in late December and have only gotten around to shooting the video now. Perhaps they had to train him to sit still first? “This dog was very important to the Americans,” Taliban spokesman Zabiullah Mujahid told NBC News. “Once we got this dog, the Americans tried their best to get it back but they did not succeed.” However, the nationality of the reddish-brown dog is still up for grabs – the Taliban say its American but US military officials in Washington said it belonged to a British unit. Luckily, it’s just a dog. But if they ever hold a cat hostage next, I just might have to join the military. NBC News

Burqa BabyBurqas for babies? A Saudi cleric is calling for baby girls to start sporting burqas in order to protect them from getting raped. Sheik Abdulla Daoud told al-Majd TV that babies were being molested in Saudi Arabia and the only solution he could come up with was more burqas. I’m pretty sure a burqa isn’t going to stop a pedophile from getting what he wants, but luckily I’m not the only one who thinks so. Senior Islamic officers and social media savvy Saudis have also criticized Daoud’s comments after the video surfaced online. Sheikh Mohammad al-Jjzlana, a former judge at the Saudi Board of Grievances, said that Daoud’s fatwa made Islam and Sharia law look bad. No kidding. MSN

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