Greenpeace Activists = Pirates… And Other News

Greenpeace

What do pirates and Greenpeace activists have in common? EVERYTHING! (says Russia).

Russian authorities have officially charge 14 Greenpeace activists with piracy after two of them tried to scale a Russian oil rig platform last month in protest of… oil rigs I guess. Greenpeace is calling the piracy charges, which can carry a sentence of 15 years in prison, “irrational, absurd and an outrage”. Even Vladimir Putin said it was “completely obvious” that the activists were not pirates. Russian Speed BumpNevertheless, they broke the law by boarding the oil rig owned by the Russian state-controlled firm Gazprom, and everybody knows you don’t mess with the Russians. I mean, just look at what they use for speed bumps —>

BBC News

UghThe government shutdown isn’t just affecting the hundred of thousands of furloughed federal employees – President Obama had to cancel his trip to Asia to deal with this mess! The trip was scheduled for next week and was part of a four nation tour: Malaysia, Brunei, Indoesia and the Philippines. Malaysia was especially upset – they haven’t had a visit fro a current US president since 1966! So what’s Obama doing instead of contracting yellow fever? Holding a shutdown summit! The President called congressional leaders to the White House Wednesday to work out their problems and get the government running again. So far, neither side is willing to negotiate. New York Times

revenge_porn_legislationWant revenge on an ex? Have a few naked photos lying around? Well, watch out if you’re in California. California Gov. Jerry Brown signed a bill that banned “revenge porn,” the act of posting naked photos of your ex without their permission.  The crime, which is already banned in New Jersey, is punishable by a $1,000 fine or six months in jail. “Until now, there was no tool for law enforcement to protect victims,” the bill’s author, senator Anthony Cannella, said in a statement. “Too many have had their lives upended because of an action of another that they trusted.” Remember kids, living well is the best revenge. And if that fails, just move to a state that still allows revenge porn. The Guardian

tom clancyPeople everywhere are going to have to find something new to thrill them in the bedroom because bestselling novelist Tom Clancy has died at the age of 66. Clancy was the author of such thrillers as The Hunt for Red October, Patriot Games, Clear and Present Danger, The Sum of All Fears… he wrote a lot of books. His last novel, another in the Jack Ryan series, titled Command Authority, is scheduled to come out on December 3rd. Will it be the biggest seller yet? CNN

SaudisProgress? Progress! A court in eastern Saudi Arabia sentenced a husband to 20 lashes for allegedly hitting his wife on her shoulder. Although the man said he was “only joking” and the wife later dropped the charges, the prosecution still went through with the charges. The wife is also allowed to attend the flogging. Now if only she could drive herself there… ANI News

Killer HornetsKiller hornets on the loose in China! Giant hornets in northern China have killed 41 people and injured 1,600 since July. The hornets, which measure 2 inches and have a wingspan of 3 inches, have been known to chase victims for hundreds of meters and sting them hundreds of times. The venom from the stings can cause anaphylactic shock and kidney failure. That is if the sheer terror of getting chased by killer hornets doesn’t give you a heart attack first. The Independent

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