Mikhail Kalashnikov: Oops I Invented a Gun, Killed Millions of People… And Other News

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Before his death last month at the ripe age of 94, Mikhail Kalashnikov was apparently suffering from inventor’s remorse.

The famed designer of the AK-47 reportedly wrote a regretful letter to the Patriarch of the Russian Orthodox Church months before he died saying his “spiritual pain is unbearable” and wondering if he was to blame for the deaths of those killed by the guns. It appears as though Kalashnikov became a softie as his death approached. The letter was in sharp contrast to his previous statements refusing to accept any responsibility for the carnage wrought by his weapon. “I sleep well. It’s the politicians who are to blame for failing to come to an agreement and resorting to violence,” Kalashnikov said in 2007. Guns don’t kill people, people kill people! Luckily, the church is pro-Kalashnikov and responded to the letter with: “The Church has a very definite position: If the weapon is used to defend the Motherland, the Church supports both its creators and the servicemen using it.” National Post

SextingThink before you sext! A Canadian teenager has been found guilty of possessing and disseminating child pornography after sending text messages containing naked images of her boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend. The BC girl, who has 16 at the time of the sexting scandal, sent the nude pictures around and along with threatening messages to the girl in the pictures. The judge deemed the messages “mean, rude and antagonistic” and since all the parties involved were underage, it counts as child porn. If only they had waited a few years to sext…  Since it’s legal for adults to send “erotic images,” the case would never have gone to court. CTV News

Club MadonnaSpeaking of inappropriate sexual behaviour among teens, a Miami Beach strip club has been shut down after a 13-year-old stripper was found working at the club. The almost pre-teen pole dancer (stage name: Peaches) was a runaway who was allegedly forced to prostitute herself and dance nude at the club. Club Madonna’s license has been revoked for six months while police investigate and three people have been arrested so far. “Based on the gravity of recent allegations, the evidence collected and the owner’s admitted failure to have the required knowledge of what illegal activity occurs at Club Madonna, I have determined that this activity presents an actual threat to the public health, welfare and safety of the public,” said Miami Beach City Manager Jimmy L. Morales, “If it is so easy for human traffickers to kidnap a 13-year-old girl and bring her to the club without anyone noticing, how can we be sure that this is not going to happen again to other young girls in our community?” Miami Herald

BRIDGEGATEBridgegate continues. After a suspicious email was released last week suggesting that New Jersey Gov. Chris Chrisite’s staff closed down 2 lanes of the George Washington Bridge as political retaliation for the Mayor of Fort Lee not supporting Christie’s reelection, hundreds of new documents have been revealed. The newly released documents include hundred of pages of emails further incriminating New Jersey’s top two Port Authority appointees. Chris Christie issued a statement last week claiming he had no knowledge of the political vendetta and has now moved on to his latest scandal: Sandy Funds-gate. The Republican Governor is now being investigated by federal officials for his use of Superstorm Sandy relief funds to produce tourism ads starring him and his family. The winning bid featured the Christie family and cost $25 million to produce, $2 million more than the losing bid which did not feature the less than photogenic governor. CNN

Pope AbortionThe Pope believes abortions are just like my used yogurt containers – except slightly less messy. Pope Francis proved he’s not so liberal after all when he criticized abortion as part of a “throwaway culture”  that wastes people as well as food. Francis declared that, “Unfortunately what is thrown away is not only food and dispensable objects but often human beings themselves, who are discarded as unnecessary.” Francis believes that this throwaway mentality is a threat to world peace and lamented that it’s disgusting that so much food is thrown away when there are millions of children suffering from hunger. Maybe there wouldn’t be as many hungry children if some of them were aborted… Problem solved. ABC News

israel-ariel-sharon-deathWait, Ariel Sharon was still alive?? Well, not anymore. The former Israeli prime minister Ariel Sharon, who spent the last 8 years in a coma after suffering a stroke, finally died on Saturday at the age of 85. Israel and the rest of the world said goodbye to their comatose leader on Monday with a state ceremony filled with Jewish VIPs and international dignitaries. U.S. Vice-President Joe Biden took Sharon’s passing especially hard, saying the death felt “like a death in the family.” Less upset was the Arab community who consider him a war criminal drenched in Palestinian blood. CBC News

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