Rand Paul Loves Black People… And Other News.

Rand Paul Howard U

Rand Paul loves black people, but they don’t love him back.

Kentucky Senator and filibuster expert Rand Paul, spoke to students at Howard University, a historically black college in Washington, D.C, on Wednesday. The speech seemed to be an attempt at racial outreach but came across sounding more like the “Accidental Racist”. Rand Paul explained the students that the Republican party was at one point very a strong supporter of civil rights for African Americans. But then he seemed to forget about the GOP’s relationship with black voters for the last 50 years. As Jon Stewart put it: “You can’t just yada yada yada the last 60 Republican years. A Republican freed the slaves, gave black people the vote, yada yada yada and now all blacks vote Democratic. I mean, what the hell.’” The Daily Beast

Glee School ShootingSchools shootings are now so popular that even Glee is covering them. Thursday night’s episode, entitled “Shooting Star” (great pun, Glee!), features a school shooting.  The  show began with a disclaimer reading “This episode of ‘Glee’ addresses the topic of school violence. Viewer discretion is advised.” Spoiler alert: it was the Down syndrome kid who shot the gun and no one was injured.  Lesson learned: don’t ever give kids with Down syndrome guns. ABC News

FarrahHow to not make a sex tape: do it on a set with a porn star, have it professionally produced and call it a ‘sex tape’. That’s what Teen Mom Farrah Abraham has done. In what some (me) are calling the third stupidest decision of her life (the first being getting pregnant at 16 and the second being waxing her toddler’s eyebrows), Farrah made a porno with porn actor James Deen.  However, she initially claimed it was a sex tape, trying to add a few extra minutes on to her original fifteen. But after James Deen opened his big mouth, Farrah finally conceded that the video was in fact scripted and shot by professionals. Her excuse?  She wanted to immortalize her youthful physique. I guess that’s as good a reason as any. Daily Mail

Hitler YouthThink like a Nazi. Argue why Jews are evil. That’s what students in an Albany High School English class were asked to do for an assignment. Students were asked to watch and read Nazi propaganda and convince their teacher of their Nazi loyalty. The assignment read: “You must argue that Jews are evil, and use solid rationale from government propaganda to convince me of your loyalty to the Third Reich!” A third of the student refused to complete the assignment and the Albany Superintendent issued an apology. “I would apologize to our families,” she said. “I don’t believe there was malice or intent to cause any insensitivities to our families of Jewish faith.” I totally would have gotten an A. National Post

Teen SuicideWhat not to do after you rape someone: post pictures of the attack online. Three teenage boys were arrested Thursday in California for the sexual assault of a 15-year-old girl who committed suicide after pictures of the incident surfaced online. This case is similar to the Steubenville, Ohio rape case where two football players were convicted of rape for assaulting a girl who had too much to drink and posting photos on social media sites. More recently, a Canadian teen committed suicide after she was allegedly gang-raped and bullied after photos were distributed.  CNN

Madonna MalawiMalawi’s President has a total hard-on for Madonna. A government statement was put out on Wednesday criticizing the pop singer for demanding VIP treatment, being a big bully and exaggerating her contributions to the country. Malawi’s President Joyce Banda claims she knew nothing about it and is reportedly furious at her public relations staff. Despite this, there is no sign of an official apology being issued. BBC News

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