Suicide Bomb Instructor Accidentally Blows Up His Class

Suicide Bomber Camp

Rule Number 1 of teaching aspiring suicide bombers: train the instructor.

Rule Number 2 of teaching aspiring suicide bombers: don’t give lessons with live explosives.

The commander of an Iraqi militant group accidentally killed himself and 21 members of his unit on Monday after he conducted a demonstration with live explosives at a secluded terrorist training camp north of Baghdad.  The demonstration, as you can imagine, blew their minds.

Another 15 members of the group were injured in the explosion caused by the careless instructor. But to be fair, it is difficult to find decent suicide bomb instructors with proper work experience these days.

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The Sunni militants/suicide-bombers-in-training belonged to the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, also known as ISIS, and have been engaged in fighting with the Iraqi government army.  Known for conducting suicide bombings throughout the country, ISIS has been behind the daily attacks on public markets, mosques, funerals and even children’s soccer games.

Needless to say, Iraqi citizens aren’t too upset about the “tragedy”. In fact, they consider it some sweet, sweet karma.

“This is so funny,” local resident Raad Hashim said. “It shows how stupid they are, those dogs and sons of dogs.”

“This is God showing justice,” Hashim continued. “This is God sending a message to the bad people and the criminals in the world, to tell them to stop the injustice and to bring peace. Evil will not win in the end. It’s always life that wins over death.”

Another resident of the area was also pretty psyched:

“I heard this today when my friend rang me in the afternoon to tell me about it. He was so happy as if he was getting married.”

“Which made me happy as well,” the resident said. “I hope that their graves burn and all the rest of them burn as well. I was not happy with the number killed, though: I wanted more of them to die, as I remember my friend who was killed by a suicide bomber in 2007.”

I’m glad they’re happy, but ultimately the joke’s on them; those suicide bomber trainees are now living it up with 72 virgins. Or just dead with random bloodied body parts strewn all over the suicide training camp.

Via: The New York Times

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