Tag Archives: Angela Merkel

Angela Merkel Breaks Her Pelvis Skiing

Angela Merkel Skiing

Two Germans down, more to go? A week after Formula One world champion Michael Schumacher slammed his head on a rock while skiing off-piste, German Chancellor Angela Merkel suffered a pelvic fracture after falling during a cross-country ski trip.

While Schumacher’s injury sent the 45-year-old German into a medically induced coma while he fights for his life, Angela Merkel’s injury was a bit less severe. Merkel, 59, had been skiing “at low speeds” while on vacation in the Swiss Alps when she fell, cracking her pelvis.

Ski experts say cross-country skiing is much less dangerous than downhill – probably because the trails are flat and cross-country skiers go at the pace of snails…

“Without wanting to play down what happened to Mrs. Merkel, the chances of injury in cross-country skiing are slim compared to downhill,” said Michael Berner of Germany’s Foundation for Ski Safety. “Still, anyone who does cross-country skiing should learn to do it properly first and have a certain level of fitness.”

But apparently both types of skiing have the ability to knock out a German.

According to a chief government spokesman, the Chancellor will be out of commission for three weeks while her fractured pelvis heals. The doctor has ordered her to remain lying down as much as possible in the next three weeks and avoid any unnecessary trips.

Luckily, Merkel can just call up her personal masseuse, George W. Bush, and get another awkward rub down to aid her recovery.

Merkel Rub

Via: CBC News

Leave a Comment

Current Event Cat of the Day: Angela Merkel & Her Phone

Current Event Cat - Angela Merkel Phone Calls

German Chancellor Angela Merkel called President Obama on Wednesday to have an angry chat over allegations a German paper made about the U.S tapping her cell phone.

This is how the awkward conversation went (in my mind):

Angela Merkel: I am VERY upset with you President Obama!

Barack Obama: I know. You’ve been calling everyone and complaining about it for days. I mean… nevermind… no one was listening.

The German magazine, Der Spiegel, broke the story, which prompted German intelligence to investigate. They determined that there was enough plausible information that Merkel’s cell phone was targeted by the NSA to warrant a stern talking to. The German chancellor is said to be “livid” over the reports and we all know what happens when a German leader gets angry… they make an angry phone call.

Angela Merkel’s spokesman Steffen Seibert said in a statement that Merkel told Obama that Germany “has received information that the chancellor’s cellphone may be monitored by American intelligence” and that such practices are “completely unacceptable.”

But the Obama administration is denying that the National Security Agency tapped Merkel’s phone and Obama assured the German chancellor over the phone that the U.S. is not monitoring her every text. Just every other text…

I don’t know… Given the recent reports about U.S spying activities in Brazil, France, and Mexico, it’s plausible that the U.S. has been tapping Angela Merkel’s phone. How else would George W. Bush have known that she wanted a back rub?

Merkel Bush Massage

Via: The Guardian

German Election: Four More Years of Merkel


It’s good news and bad news for German Chancellor Angela Merkel. The good news: The results of Sunday’s election are in and she won! The bad news: The results of Sunday’s election are in and she fell just short of a majority, which means… COALITION TALKS.

It was a big victory for Merkel, whose conservative bloc scored its best result in 23 years, winning 41.5 percent of the vote. But at the end of the day they were five seats short of a majority in the lower house. And since Merkel’s conservative government didn’t quite make the majority threshold, they will have to form a coalition government with her rivals. Her LEFTIST rivals!

Since Merkel’s partners of choice, the pro-business Free Democrats, won only 4.8 percent of the vote, effectively barring them from obtaining parliamentary seats, a coalition with the centre-left Social Democrats (SPD), who won 25.7% of the vote, is seen as most likely – but it will take some hard bargaining. The Social Democrats are expected to play some good old fashioned hardball this time – demanding high profile cabinet posts and policy changes. Why? Their supporters are getting sick and tired of the party teaming up with Merkel -like they did in both 2005 and 2009. The SPD suffered a big drop in its electoral support in 2009 after their increasingly alienated base grew weary of always looking like the junior partner in Merkel’s coalition.

SPD leader Peer Steinbrueck clashed with Merkel during the lead up to the election, mainly over economic issues. The centre-left party argued for a national minimum wage and higher taxes on the wealthy and criticized Merkel’s economic austerity drive, saying Germany was too hard on its EU partners in southern Europe. Merkel disagrees, arguing that her election victory is proof that Germans are pro-austerity measures and anti-heavily indebted countries (Greece…).

At a news conference following her win Merkel said that “our European policy course will not change”.

So Merkel’s got her work cut out for her… but she’s got some time – several weeks of negotiations are expected before a new government is formed.

On the bright side, at least she’s still able to govern after winning 41.5% of the vote. I know a certain environmentalist who got the boot after winning the popular vote… damn electoral colleges.

Via: The National Post

Leave a Comment