Tag Archives: Georgia

Rambo Shooter Opens Fire Days After Georgia Passes “Guns Everywhere” Bill… And Other News.

FedEx Shooting Rambo Style

Rambo impersonator attacks FedEx!

A 19-year-old package handler decked out “Rambo-style,” with an assault rifle and bullets strapped to his chest, opened fire on fellow employees at a FedEx facility in suburban Atlanta early Tuesday morning. Six people were sent to the hospital following the shooting and the suspect, 19-year-old Geddy L. Kramer of Acworth, died from a self-inflicted gunshot. “He had an assault rifle. He had bullets strapped to his chest like Rambo,” a FedEx employee said. “I mean, he looked like he was heading into war. As soon as I saw him, I ran the other way. I ran and made sure that people upstairs were gone. He was in all black. I think he had a camo vest.” Maybe now Georgia will reconsider their “GUNS EVERYWHERE” bill? No, who am I kidding? They love that bill. USA Today

Assad Third TermThere’s no time like the middle of a civil war to start your reelection campaign! Syrian President Bashar al-Assad has announced he will seek a third presidential term when Syria holds its election on June 3. Yes, Assad has decided to throw his hat into the ring for a third seven year term! And by hat, I mean a fistful of nerve gas and by ring, I mean a Damascus suburb. And who had the good taste to nominate the Syrian dictator? Bashar al-Assad of course! “I… Dr. Bashar Hafez al-Assad… wish to nominate myself for the post of president of the republic,” the dictator announced in a letter read by Parliament Speaker Mohammad al-Laham. As of now Assad leads a list of 24 presidential hopefuls who have registered as potential candidates for the June election. Despite poisoning his own people with nerve gas and failing to meet Syria’s second deadline for surrendering chemical weapons, Assad is the overwhelming favourite and is expected to coast to victory – mostly because the election is a sham. But in all seriousness I’m sure he’ll get a few legitimate votes – like from that guy who nominated him. LA Times

ZonkeyWhat do you get when you cross a donkey with a zebra? Adorable! Following the unlikely love affair between a female zebra named Rayas and a dwarf albino donkey named Ignacio, a rare zonkey was born at a zoo in northern Mexico. The zonkey, named Khumba, was born on April 21 at the Reynosa Zoo in northeastern Mexico and already rocks some pretty awesome zebra-striped legs. The birth of the little zonkey was a big surprise, as the zebra and donkey chromosomes are not usually compatible and no one is typically attracted to albino dwarves. Telegraph

Buffalo JillsIf having to watch every Buffalo Bills football game wasn’t bad enough, the Bills’ cheerleaders also have to put up with bad wages and “jiggle tests”. The Buffalo Bills’ cheerleaders (aka the Buffalo Jills) filed suit last week against the National Football League for what they claim is an unfair wage system. The five cheerleaders who brought the lawsuit forward complained that they were forced to work hundreds of hours without pay, cover their own travel expenses and spend hundreds of dollars on uniforms – all of which violates the state’s $8-an-hour minimum-wage rule. With personal costs, one cheerleader said in a press conference that she estimated she made just $105 during the 2012-2013 season. And then there’s the “jiggle tests”… In addition to putting up with “degrading sexual comments and inappropriate touching” at promotional events, dancers were given penalties if they failed the “jiggle test,” a visual inspection of a dancer’s body fat. Wait, the jiggle test has nothing to do with boobs? That’s more surprising than only making $105 a season. Globe and Mail

Prom StabbingSome teenagers deal with a rejected prom invite by binge eating ice cream and crying at home, others simply stab their crush to death. A 16-year-old boy was charged on Tuesday after he stabbed a female classmate to death outside their Connecticut high school because she rejected his invitation to the prom. Christopher Plaskon, a junior at Jonathan Law High School in Milford, about an hour away from New York City, admitted to stabbing his dream prom date with a kitchen knife, telling a police officer, “I did it. Just arrest me.” Meanwhile, the prom, which was scheduled for last Friday night, has been postponed. Way to ruin it for everybody Christopher! Reuters

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Sarah Palin’s America: Baptizing Terrorists Since 2001

Sarah Palin Baptizing Terrorists

Speaking at the National Rifle Association (NRA) convention last week, Sarah Palin gave America a taste of what life would be like if she were in charge – and it involves baptizing terrorists via waterboarding.

The former Alaska governor and 2008 GOP vice presidential nominee let terrorists (and the NRA crowd) know how the United States would deal with their enemies if she were president.

“They obviously have information on plots to carry out jihad,” Palin said of terrorists. “Oh, but you can’t offend them, can’t make them feel uncomfortable, not even a smidgen. Well, if I were in charge, they would know that waterboarding is how we baptize terrorists.”

First, thank God that’s a hypothetical. Second, that wasn’t even the dumbest thing she said at Saturday’s NRA rally.

According to Palin, baptizing terrorists is a smart solution to the war on terror but creating gun-free zones in schools and other public buildings is “stupid on steroids.

“Maybe our kids could be defended against criminals on the spot if more Mama Grizzlies carried,” she said, firing up the crowd at the Indianapolis convention. “And [the] Obama administration wants you ID’d for that? Well, then go ahead and carry a sign too. A sign that says ‘Yeah, I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.’

Palin also went after Joe Biden’s recent advice to fire in the air to scare off attackers by saying:

“Just aim up in the air – that was his directive, his advice. Well, fine, Joe Squirt Gun, if your rapist is a bird.”

So always carry a gun, kill everyone you see as a threat, and baptize terrorists whenever the opportunity presents itself. Got it.

But Sarah Palin’s not the only one going gun crazy these days. The great state of Georgia just passed one of the biggest expansions of gun rights, dubbed the “Guns Everywhere” bill. The Guns Everywhere bill is exactly what it sounds like. The bill will now allow Georgians to carry firearms in schools, bars, churches, airports and government buildings – basically everywhere. Well, everywhere except the state Capitol. The lawmakers who passed the Guns Everywhere bill don’t want any gun-wielding maniacs coming into their place of work – that would be too dangerous.

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Oops That’s A Nintendo Wii, Not A Gun

Nintendo Wii

Florida trash aren’t the only ones who shoot unarmed teenagers. A Georgian cop fatally shot 17-year-old Christopher Roupe in the chest after mistaking his Nintendo Wii controller for a gun.

When officers showed up at Christopher Roupe’s home on Valentine’s Day to serve a probation violation warrant on his father, the teenager opened to door to an unpleasant surprise: death. The police officer later said in a statement that she was forced to shoot because Roupe had pointed at gun at her when he opened the door, but Roupe’s family and witnesses at the scene insist the boy was holding a Wii video game controller because he was getting ready to watch a movie.

“It just doesn’t add up,” Cole Law, the family’s attorney, observed. “We don’t know where [the claim that he had a gun] came from. The eyewitnesses on the scene clearly state that he had a Wii controller in his hand. He heard a knock at the door. He asked who it was, there was no response so he opened the door and upon opening the door he was immediately shot in the chest.”

Neighbor Ken Yates said that he saw the female officer immediately after the teen was killed and described her as being visibly distraught.

“This is tragic,” Yates said. “She came out of this house. She put her head in her hands and she was sobbing.”

The circumstances of the tragic shooting are being reviewed by the Georgia Bureau of Investigation – because a gun looks a lot different than a Nintendo Wii controller.

But in the meantime, we can now add holding a Nintendo Wii controller to the long list of reasons why you might get shot. Others include: playing loud music, texting during a movie, throwing mayonnaise on a car, and walking around wearing a hoodie in Florida.

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Current Event Cat of the Day: Ice Storm

Current Event Cat - Ice Storm

America is getting iced – and not kind that ends with a Smirnoff Ice, but the kind that ends with a lot of motor vehicle accidents.

Turns out Punxsutawney Phil wasn’t kidding around – winter is far from over. A “catastrophic” ice storm currently wreaking havoc in the southern states is set to pay a visit to the north.

After icing parts of Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama, the ice storm made its debut in Georgia on Wednesday morning. Atlanta, a city that was notoriously unprepared for the 2.5 inches of snow they experienced back in January, isn’t taking any chances this time. The metro area of Atlanta is preparing for its worst ice storm in 14 years. How? By instilling fear in its residents!

“This is one of Mother Nature’s worst kinds of storms that can be inflicted on the South,” Georgia Gov. Nathan Deal told reporters Tuesday afternoon. “That is ice. It is our biggest enemy.”

Ice is Georgia’s biggest enemy? I thought it was Obamacare and rotten peaches…

The National Weather Service also warned Georgians of a potentially “catastrophic event” and to “be prepared to be without power in some locations for days and perhaps as long as a week.”

Catastrophic… crippling… paralyzing… choose your adjective,” an Atlanta area forecaster wrote in a Wednesday morning report for the National Weather Service. “This is a very, very big deal, especially from metro Atlanta east along the I-20 corridor.”

It seems the fear is working though. This time around residents appear to be taking the warnings seriously, with many seen emptying grocery store shelves, getting gas, and filling their trunks with salt.

Meanwhile, North Carolina and Virginia are bracing for up to 1ft (30cm) of snow in addition to heavy ice accumulation from freezing rain. On Thursday the deep freeze is expected to hit New York with 6 to 10 inches of snow, allowing newly elected mayor Bill de Blasio to redeem his “slow snow clearing” reputation.

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Deep South Unable To Function In Three Inches of Snow

Deep South

A winter storm has paralyzed the Deep South, leaving residents stranded and overturned cars in the ditches.

The winter weather has gotten so bad in the metro area of Atlanta that the National Guard has been called in to deal with the situation. Some residents remained trapped in their cars overnight and many children were stranded at schools across the city. Highways have turned into parking lots, as Atlanta residents ditch their cars and/or run their cars into ditches. Apparently when they were told to stay off the road, they took it literally…

Tuesday night rush-hour traffic combined with the winter snowstorm led to gridlock and wrecks throughout the interstates. As of Tuesday night, the Georgia State Patrol said it had investigated 940 crashes resulting in one death, 104 injuries, and one birth. Gridlock on the streets of Atlanta was so bad that a police officer had to deliver a baby on a snowy highway.

The rest of the Deep South (Alabama, Louisiana, Mississippi, North Carolina and South Carolina) were also affected by the monster snowstorm. Police reported that at least five people were killed and 23 people injured due to weather-related accidents in Alabama on Tuesday.

Yikes. There must have been a lot of snow! Nope, barely three inches of snow caused the chaos, sending Minnesotans and Canadians everywhere into uncontrollable laughter. But the typically warm-weather region, where many cities do not even have snow loughs, salt trucks, or experienced drivers with winter tires, is at a loss for what to do. Not driving into the ditch would be a good start… other than that, just make sure you CHECK THE WEATHER and prepare for it.

Via: CNN

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No One Gets a Free Lunch! Except for Jack Kingston – He Gets a Free Lunch

Jack Kingston Free Lunch

Fresh off his “there’s no such thing as free lunch” for school children speech, it’s been revealed that Rep. Jack Kingston gets quite a few free lunches of his own.

Georgia Republican Jack Kingston made headlines a few weeks ago after he suggested that low-income school children should sweep the floors of their school cafeteria to learn a valuable lesson: there’s no such thing as a free lunch.

Sweep Caf“But one of the things I’ve talked to the secretary of agriculture about: Why don’t you have the kids pay a dime, pay a nickel to instill in them that there is, in fact, no such thing as a free lunch? Or maybe sweep the floor of the cafeteria — and yes, I understand that that would be an administrative problem, and I understand that it would probably lose you money,” Kingston said. “But think what we would gain as a society in getting people —getting the myth out of their head that there is such a thing as a free lunch.”

But Kingston, who defended his proposal as a “discussion about the work ethic in America,” is no stranger to free lunches. An investigation by Savannah TV station WSAV 3 found that Kingston, who is currently running for Senate, expensed as much as $4,182 worth of lunches for his office over the past three years. The anti-federal lunch program poster boy also expensed $145,391 worth of meals for campaign events as well as $24,313 in per diem “walking around money” costs travelling as a member of the House Appropriations Committee.

Even though Kingston doesn’t sweep the cafeteria floor before he eats, he feels his free lunches are justified. The congressman “defended his work ethic” to WSAV 3, saying he works 60 hours to 70 hours a week. So to sum up Jack Kingston’s free lunch philosophy, poor children should have to spend 60-70 hours per week cleaning up after the rich kids in the cafeteria in order to earn their bologna sandwich.

Via: Talking Points Memo

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Georgia Parties Like It’s 1949… And Other News.

Georgia Prom

Georgia parties like it’s 1949! But not for long: A group of high school students from Wilcox County High School in Georgia are taking a stand against their school’s tradition of holding racially-segregated proms. The group plans to organize the first-ever integrated prom in the school’s history. But not everyone is happy about this newfound integration: “I actually put up posters for the integrated prom and we’ve had people ripping them down at the school,” one of the organizers of the integrated prom, told local news station. Ok, scratch that. Georgia parties likes it’s 1849! Huffington Post

Coach RiceIt pays to beat. Fired Rutgers coach Mike Rice is set to receive a $100,000 bonus from the university for the 2012–13 basketball season. Had Rice been fired when the administration saw footage of him abusing his players in November, he wouldn’t be collecting his compensation. Instead, Rice was fired yesterday after ESPN aired the now viral video of him hurling basketballs and homophobic slurs like “f*cking f*ggot” and “f*cking fairy” at his players. Sounds like an a**hole. And who better to defend an a**hole than Sean Hannity! The Fox News host defended the coach saying “My father hit me with a belt, I turned out okay!” If you say so… ABC News

Kin Jong-wantedKim Jong-un has been acting like a total jerk lately so the “hacktivist” group Anonymous decided to do what they do best: hack. North Korea’s official Twitter and Flickr accounts have both been hacked, posting a series of unflattering tweets and photos of the 30-year-old dictator. They also posted a fake Wanted poster depicting Kim Jong-un with pig ears and a snout and offering a $1 million reward. Only $1 million? Even Kony gets $5 million! PC Mag

Lululemon PantsIt’s a pants scandal! After the whole yoga slut pants debacle, the company has announced that its Chief Product Officer will leave. Lululemon also said it had beefed up factory oversight, and is using “newly implemented rigorous testing and quality processes” on the type of fabric that was used in the super sheer pants which were recalled after numerous customer complaints. Fun Fact/Rumour: Former CEO Chip Wilson came up with the name Lululemon because he thought it would be funny to hear Japanese people say it. CNBC

AxeWhat do you do if your wife leaves you? Run around with an axe, of course! An Indian man has gone on an axe rampage in a village in central India, killing four women and five girls. The 35-year-old killer apparently became “mentally disturbed” after his wife left him. I wonder why she left… BBC News

Siskel and EbertEbert and Siskel reunite. In heaven. American film critic Roger Ebert, best known for his thumbs up thumbs down approach, has died at age 70 after a long battle with cancer. Ebert was first diagnosed with thyroid cancer in 2002 and lost his jaw and the ability to speak. But that didn’t stop him from reviewing movies – he continued writing up until his death. Chicago Sun Times

European Central Bank President Mario Draghi attends the monthly news conference in FrankfurtThe European Central Banks states the obvious: the first Cyprus plan was “not smart”. No kidding.  EBC president Mario Draghi admitted that the proposal to tax small savers to finance the bailout was a bad idea. Under the new bailout plan, Cypriots with savings under 100,000 euros would be exempt from the tax but those over the threshold will lose some of their savings. BBC News

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It’s Illegal NOT to Own a Gun in Nelson, Georgia

Nelson Georgia

Nothing says freedom like a law requiring you to own a gun! Nelson, Georgia’s city council voted Monday night to make gun ownership mandatory.

Whereas some cities are pushing for stricter gun laws in the wake of the Newtown tragedy, Nelson, Georgia has decided to take a drastically different route and stand up for/misinterpret the Second Amendment. Council members voted unanimously to approve the “Family Protection Ordinance” which will require the head of every household to own a gun and ammunition.

The ordinance, however, is largely symbolic. No penalties will be inflicted on anyone who doesn’t comply with the law. The ordinance also exempts convicted felons and those who suffer from certain physical or mental disabilities. Phew.

City Councilman Duane Cronic, who sponsored the measure, believes it will make the town (population: 1,300) a safer place.

“I likened it to a security sign that people put up in their front yards. Some people have security systems, some people don’t, but they put those signs up,” he said. “I really felt like this ordinance was a security sign for our city. Basically it was a deterrent ordinance to tell potential criminals they might want to go on down the road a little bit.”

First, I wouldn’t call a town of 1,300 a city. Second, crime in Nelson, Georgia, which only has one police officer, is very low and consists mainly of petty theft. But the police chief doesn’t agree. Even though the last homicide was over 5 years ago, Police Chief Heath Mitchell, the town’s sole police officer, believes that having a gun would deter crime and also help residents take their protection into their own hands. Protection against petty theft? Maybe Nelson should stop spending money creating symbolic laws and invest in a more useful police officer.

Via: The Toronto Star

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Georgia GOP Chairwoman: Gay Marriage Means Getting a ‘Free Ride’

 Sue Everhart Gay Marriage

The best reason to oppose gay marriage? Benefits fraud. At least according to Georgia GOP Chairwoman Sue Everhart. Everhart warned that straight people might enter into fraudulent gay marriages to obtain benefits.

“You may be as straight as an arrow, and you may have a friend that is as straight as an arrow,” Everhart said. “Say you had a great job with the government where you had this wonderful health plan. I mean, what would prohibit you from saying that you’re gay, and y’all get married and still live as separate, but you get all the benefits? I just see so much abuse in this it’s unreal. I believe a husband and a wife should be a man and a woman, the benefits should be for a man and a woman.”

Everhart added:

“There is no way that this is about equality. To me, it’s all about a free ride.

This makes no sense for a number of reasons. First, while I suppose it’s ‘theoretically possible’ for heterosexual people to use gay marriage to scam their way into getting tax breaks, there isn’t any evidence of widespread fraud following the adoption of gay marriage in nine states and the District of Columbia. Second, how does gay marriage even fit into this? What’s to stop opposite sex friends from entering into a fraudulent marriage?

Unless Sue Everhart is mentally retarded (which may in fact be the case), the only logical explanation is she must have recently watched he Adam Sandler/Kevin James movie I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. That movie/disaster might be enough to scare someone into denouncing gay marriage.

But Everhart’s other comments suggest she’s really just a bigot at heart and the fraudulent marriage argument may just be a cover.

“Lord, I’m going to get in trouble over this, but it is not natural for two women or two men to be married,” Everhart said. “If it was natural, they would have the equipment to have a sexual relationship.”

Does the butt not count as a sexual relationship? I mean, if Cosmopolitan taught me anything, it’s that a man’s g-spot is his prostate. And there’s only one way to get in there…

Either way, I smell a great GOP presidential candidate for 2016!

Via: The Huffington Post

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