Tag Archives: New Zealand

New Zealander Fights Off Shark, Stitches Own Leg, Heads to Pub

New Zealand Shark James Grant

New Zealanders are apparently a badass bunch. James Grant, a 24-year-old New Zealand doctor, fought off a shark, stitched his own leg up, and then went to the pub.

James Grant was spearfishing with friends near Colac Bay at the base of New Zealand’s South Island on Saturday when he felt a tug on his leg. After realizing it was a shark and not his friend playing a prank, James thought, “bugger, now I have to try and get this thing off my leg.”

So he did what any rugged New Zealander would do, said “that’s not a knife, THIS is a knife (presumably), and stabbed the shark with his spear before rushing to shore.

“I sort of just fought the shark off. The shark got a few stabs. The knife wasn’t long enough though,” he told reporters after.

After taking off his wetsuit he discovered bites marks up to 5cm long on his leg. This is the point where I would sit down, cry, and wait for someone to take me to the hospital, but Grant sutured his own wound using a first aid kit he kept in his vehicle and joined his friends at Colac bay Tavern to celebrate.

“It would have been great if I had killed it because there was a fishing competition on at the Colac Bay Tavern,” Grant said.

“I am pretty grateful to have my leg still,” he added. “When the stitches come out, I will be back in the water.”

And the award for manliest man goes to….

Via: ABC News 

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New Zealand is Cracking Down on Bizarre Baby Names

Baby Names

The country’s Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages has had enough with crazy New Zealanders and their crazy baby names.

On Wednesday New Zealand officials released their growing list of banned baby names in an effort to stops parents from trying to give their children bizarre and embarrassing names.

The New Zealand government must approve any name a parent wants to bestow upon their child. The criteria for acceptable names is they must not cause offense to a reasonable person, not be unreasonably long and should not resemble an official title and rank.

Some of the unique names that were rejected include: 4Real, Mafia No Fear, and Anal. Some parents decided to forgo the alphabet altogether and just name their offspring “.” or “*”. In other cases, parents got so lazy they wanted to give their children numbers: 1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc. Someone should suggest that to the Duggars – it would be a great time saver.

These were all one off cases, but there were also some repeat rejections. Apparently, New Zealanders have a thing for implying their children hold royal titles.

New Zealand’s Top 12 Most Commonly Rejected Names:

  • Justice – 62 
times
  • King – 31
  • Princess – 28
  • Prince – 27
  • Royal – 25
  • Duke – 10
  • Major – 9
  • Bishop – 9
  • Majesty – 7
  • 1J – 6
  • Lucifer – 6
  • Use of brackets around middle names – 4 (Please let “use of brackets around middle name” be the actual name)

New Zealand didn’t always used to be so uptight about baby names. In 2008, Number 16 Bus Shelter managed to make its way through. And before that, Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii was approved. Although, the girl was later made a ward of the court so she could change the name that traumatized her….

Rejecting unusual baby names is not exclusive to New Zealand. Other countries such as Germany, Sweden, China and Japan also restrict names. Germany nixed Osama bin Laden and Sweden said no to Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116.

But no country is as anal as Iceland when it comes to baby names. Iceland has a list of 1,853 female names and 1,712 male ones. Parents must pick from these lists or seek permission from a special committee. And traditionally masculine names can’t be given to females – just ask the 15-year-old girl who fought in court for the government to recognize her name as Blaer.

Don’t worry – in North America things are much more relaxed. American parents can pretty much name their child anything. Just ask Vagina, Mustard M Mustard, and Lettuce. If they haven’t been beaten to death on the playground yet…

Via: CNN

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New Zealand Lawmakers Break into Song… And Other News

New Zealand Gay Marriage

What makes New Zealand lawmakers suddenly break out into Maori love songs? Legalizing gay marriage!

New Zealand became the 13th country in the world to legalize gay marriage after Parliament voted 77 to 44 in favor of the bill. Cheers and apparently some kind of Maori love song called “Pokarekare Ana” erupted in the halls as the votes were counted. The list of countries where gay marriage is legal is now: Argentina, Belgium, Canada, Denmark, Iceland, Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Spain, Sweden, Uruguay. Legislation pending in Britain and France. Sydney Morning Herald

Boston MarathonMost (but not all) news outlets have been reporting that a suspect in the Boston Marathon bombings was arrested. But the Boston Police Department is denying that an arrest has been made. However, Law enforcement officials have identified a suspect from security footage showing a man dropping off a bag on the street near the race’s finish line. The man then walked away from the bag, looking suspicious… Investigators have been going through thousands of pieces of evidence ranging from mobile phone pictures and recordings to fragments of shrapnel from victims’ legs. BBC News

Texas DA MurderSo much for accusing the Aryan brotherhood. Turns out the wife of a former judge was behind the slayings of a North Texas district attorney, his wife and an assistant district attorney. Kim Lene Williams was arrested early this morning, after the arrest of her husband over the weekend. Their motives? The victims had prosecuted Williams’ husband, Eric Lyle Williams, over the theft of three computers from a public building in 2011. Williams was found guilty and had his law license taken away. Seems like a bit of an overreaction… National Post

Angry Bible RagecaseDon’t you hate it when your parents make you do chores instead of letting you read the bible? Maybe you should shoot them. That’s what some rage-case teenager from Columbus, Georgia did. After the 15-year-old’s parents asked him to finish his chores when all he really wanted to do was look up some Bible verse, his rage grew and grew until he took a 9mm handgun from his parents nightstand and opened fire. Both parents made a full recovery and the teen is being held at a Youth Detention Centre. Anger+bible+easy access to gun = bad combination… Raw Story

Palestine PresidentAmerican Idol meets The Apprentice in a new Palestinian reality show. Contestants complete for the coveted title of President of Palestine. Challenges include “acting as the Palestinian ambassador to a foreign country, managing a large corporation for a day and joining a televised political debate.” The only catch? They don’t actually become the president of anything. The winner will receive an as-yet-unannounced prize. Although Prime Minister Salam Fayyad did just resign last week, so maybe that position is available? Washington Post

And now, for no reason, here’s Toronto Mayor Rob Ford walking into a camera:

Rob Ford Walking into Camera

Still more graceful than his attempt at hiking a football:

Rob Ford Hiking a Football

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