Tag Archives: Obama

Gov. Scott Walker Won’t Admit Obama is Christian… But At Least He Didn’t Say Obama Hates America

Scott Walker

Gov. Scott Walker of Wisconsin, an unfortunately likely contender for the 2016 Republican nomination for President, says he doesn’t know whether or not President Obama is Christian.

Side note: if you’re unfamiliar with Gov. Walker, just picture a younger George W. Bush – but without the education. Seriously, he never graduated.

In an interview at the JW Marriott hotel in Washington, where he was attending the winter meeting of the National Governors Association, Gov. Walker replied “I don’t know” when asked if he thought President Obama was a Christian.

When informed that Obama had often spoken publicly about his Christian beliefs, Walker continued to play dumb.

“I’ve actually never talked about it or I haven’t read about that,” Walker said, his voice calm and firm. “I’ve never asked him that,” he added.

A spokesman for Walker later said the governor was taking a principled stand by not answering irrelevant questions, not casting doubt on the president’s faith. Plus, he simply wanted to confirm his conservative voters suspicions that Obama is a raging Muslim.

But at least Gov. Walker didn’t come out and say Obama hates America. That gem belongs to former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani.

“I do not believe, and I know this is a horrible thing to say, but I do not believe that the president loves America,” said the former New York mayor at an event supporting Gov. Walker. “He doesn’t love you. And he doesn’t love me. He wasn’t brought up the way you were brought up and I was brought up, through love of this country.”

Scott Walker could have taken the John McCain route and actively challenged conservatives attacking Obama’s patriotism and citizenship… but instead he took the Scott Walker route and pleaded ignorance, declining to condemn or condone Giuliani’s comments.

“I don’t know, I honestly don’t know, one way or the other,” Walker said about Obama’s patriotism. “I’ve said that 100 times, too.”

You could fill a book with things Gov. Walker doesn’t know: Obama’s religion, Obama’s level of patriotism, whether or not evolution is real… In retrospect it probably wasn’t a good idea for him to drop out of school.

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Current Event Cat of the Day: War on ISIS

Current Event Cat - ISIS Airstrikes

Watch out ISIS, eleven years, thousands of lives, and $1.7 trillion later, we’re going back in! But to a lesser extent…

In his address to the nation, President Obama outlined a multi-phase plan for combating IS (the militants formerly known as ISIS), saying the country would lead a “broad coalition to roll back this terrorist threat.”

The multi-phase plan can be summed up as follows:

Phase One: Airstrikes galore

Phase Two: Train the Iraqi military (for a while)

Phase Three: Deal with Syria

But the President was quick to stress that the U.S. efforts against Islamic State will not, I repeat NOT, escalate to a full-blown war. While he admitted airstrikes alone would not defeat IS, Obama said, “the boots on the ground have to be Iraqi.”

“I want the American people to understand how this effort will be different from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan,” he said. While the U.S. will send 475 service members to Iraq, they will “not have a combat mission,” but rather, provide intelligence, training, and equipment.

“We will not be dragged into another ground war,” said Obama. “We cannot do for Iraqis what they must do for themselves.”

Judging from the current state of the Iraqi military, this war will be going on for a while…

Luckily this time around, the U.S has a few allies (and more evidence to support their claim that ISIS is evil than they had to support the theory that Saddam Hussein was stockpiling WMDs). Already, France has agreed to support airstrikes and ten Arab states, including Saudi Arabia, have agreed to rally with the US in tackling the threat posed by the jihadists.

So far the U.S. has conducted more than 150 airstrikes in Iraq in an effort to halt IS’s advances and they aren’t afraid to head into Syria. While the U.S has refrained from seeking the help of Syrian President/Dictator Bashar al-Assad in the fight against Islamic State, Obama made it clear in his speech that the U.S. “will not hesitate” to go into Syria if need be.

“If you threaten America, you will find no safe haven,” Obama said.

As for congressional approval, Obama isn’t too worried. Although the President said he has the “authority to address the threat” posed by ISIS, he “welcomes congressional support to show the world that Americans are united in confronting this danger.” Obama has also asked Congress to allocate $5 billion for counterrorism funding, which may end up being a bigger fight than the one against IS in Iraq.

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North Korea Calls President Obama a “Wicked Black Monkey”

Obama and MOnkey

Someone’s not a fan of President Obama, but this time it’s not a Republican – it’s Kim Jong Un!

In a series of articles published last Friday, the North Korean media went on an extremely racist and somewhat offensive tirade against the US President. The government controlled media called President Obama a “wicked black monkey,” a “clown,” a “dirty fellow” and somebody who “does not even have the basic appearances of a human being.” Wow – they just out-Sterlinged Donald Sterling. Will Kim Jong Un be forced to sell North Korea now?

“As I watch him more closely, I realize that he looks like an African native monkey with a black face, gaunt grey eyes, cavate nostrils, plump mouth and hairy rough ears,” one article said.

“It would be perfect for Obama to live with a group of monkeys in the world’s largest African natural zoo and lick the breadcrumbs thrown by spectators.”

But Dennis Rodman is still A-Okay. He looks more like an alien than a monkey anyway.

Now, this type of offensive rhetoric is a huge departure from the North Korean government’s usual commitment to sane and civilized criticism of international leaders… oh no, wait, Obama bashing is actually pretty standard.

The White House typically ignores the rhetorical excesses of the North Korean regime, chalking it up to good old-fashioned dictatorial brainwashing tactics – but this time Kim Jong Un went too far.

“While the North Korean Government-controlled media are distinguished by their histrionics, these comments are particularly ugly and disrespectful,” Caitlin Hayden, a spokeswoman for the National Security Council, said in a statement.

But North Koreans aren’t being racist; they just know that the ideal physical type is a pale, chubby 5-foot Asian man with an awkward haircut. In fact, they believe it’s Americans who are the racist ones.

In response to a United Nations report on North Korea’s human rights violations, the official Korean Central News Agency released a report of their own titled “News Analysis on Poor Human Rights Records in U.S.” The article refers to the U.S. as “the world’s worst human right abuser and tundra of a human being’s rights to existence” and accuses the U.S. of being a “kingdom of racial discrimination”.

The North Korean report makes the following points:

  • “Under the citizenship act, racialism is getting more severe in the U.S. The gaps between the minorities and the whites are very wide in the exercise of such rights to work and elect.”
  • “The U.S. true colors as a kingdom of racial discrimination was fully revealed by last year’s case that the Florida Court gave a verdict of not guilty to a white policeman who shot to death an innocent black boy.”
  • “That’s why 52 percent of the Americans have said that racism still exists in the country while 46 percent contended that all sorts of discrimination would be everlasting.”

Well, they got a few of the Zimmerman facts mixed up, but the article does have a few good points. Still, at least you don’t hear Americans going around calling black people “wicked black monkeys” – unless, of course,  you happen to find yourself on a Nevada ranch or at an LA Clippers game.

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Current Event Cat of the Day: Nerd Prom: Boehner Jokes and a Stellar 2013

Current Event Cat - Boehner Jokes Nerd Prom

Another year, another Nerd Prom. At Saturday night’s White House Correspondents Association dinner, President Obama President Obama’s writers were able to let off a little steam, have a drink, and tell a few John Boehner jokes.

Obama started off the annual White House Correspondents’ Dinner comedy routine quipping that he usually starts with “a few self-deprecating jokes, but after my stellar 2013, what could I possibly talk about?” Adding moments later, “At one point, things got so bad the 47 percent called Mitt Romney to apologize.”

Of course Obama had to mention the botched rollout of HealthCare.gov, the pinnacle of his stellar year.

“Of course, we rolled out Healthcare.gov. That could have gone better.” Obama deadpanned.

“In 2008, my slogan was, ‘Yes we can.’ In 2013 my slogan was Control, Alt, Delete.”

Obama even brought out former Department of Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius to “fix” a technical problem that he was seemingly having.

“I got this,” Sebelius said. “I see it all the time.”

After a little self-deprecating humor, Obama took a few jabs at the media outlets.

“I am a little jet-lagged from my trip to Malaysia. The lengths we have to go to to get CNN coverage these days. I think they’re still searching for their table.”

MSNBC is here—they’re a little over-whelmed. They’ve never seen an audience this big before.”

“The Koch brothers bought a table here tonight, but as usual they used a shadowy right-wing organization as a front. Hello, Fox News.”

“Let’s face it, Fox, you’ll miss me when I’m gone. It’ll be harder to convince the American people that Hillary was born in Kenya.”

And, of course, the Republicans were not off-limits:

“Gridlock has gotten so bad, you’ve got to wonder, what did we do to piss off Chris Christie so bad?”

“I haven’t seen anybody pull a 180 that fast since Rand Paul disinvited that Nevada rancher from this dinner,” Obama said, praising Olympic gold medal snowboarder Jamie Anderson, who was in the crowd. “As a general rule, things don’t end well if your sentence starts, ‘Let me tell you something I know about the Negro.’ You don’t really need to hear the rest of it.”

Oompa Loompa BoehnerBut what was perhaps Obama’s best line of the night is when he poked fun at Speaker John Boehner’s oompa loompa-ness.

Referring to Boehner, Obama joked, “These days House Republicans are giving him a harder time than they give me, which means orange really is the new black.”

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Botched Execution Leaves Obama Pondering the Death Penalty

Obama Ponders Death Penalty Botched Execution

President Barack Obama said the botched execution of Oklahoma inmate Clayton Lockett was “deeply troubling” and warned the incident raises “significant questions about how the death penalty is being applied.”

Clayton Lockett, a convicted murderer, suffered a massive heart attack and died while being administered an untested drug cocktail during his botched execution. Well, it’s not really a botched execution if he ended up dead. It’s more like a successful execution – just a little crueler and more unusual than normal.

After failing to find viable veins elsewhere, prison officials in Oklahoma inserted lethal drugs into Lockett’s groin, not knowing that the groin vein they had chosen had collapsed. As a result, things took a bit longer than usual. Lockett died 43 minutes after the start of the injection, eventually succumbing to a heart attack after writhing in agony for a while.

As heartwarming as it may be to see a man who shot a 19-year-old girl and buried her alive suffer while dying, the problems surrounding Lockett’s execution have left Obama wondering if the death penalty is all it’s cracked up to be.

What happened in Oklahoma is deeply troubling,” Obama admitted during a joint White House news conference.

“The individual who was subject to the death penalty had committed heinous crimes, terrible crimes.”

“And I’ve said in the past that there are certain circumstances in which a crime is so terrible that the application of the death penalty may be appropriate — mass killings, the killings of children.”

“But I’ve also said that in the application of the death penalty in this country, we’ve seen significant problems. Racial bias.”

“An uneven application of the death penalty. Situations in which there were individuals on death row who later on were discovered to have been innocent because of exculpatory evidence.”

“And all these, I think, do raise significant questions about how the death penalty is being applied.”

And what’s even more deeply troubling is that a guy who raped an 11-month-old baby was scheduled to die two hours after Lockett so his execution got cancelled! But not to fear – Republican Gov. Mary Fallin only ordered a 14-day stay of execution for baby rapist Charles Warner. And now that the “newly tried” cocktail of drugs has officially been tested on Lockett, everything should go smoothly – as long as Warner doesn’t have faulty veins.

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Who Knew That Tupac Shakur Was Alive And Well In Russia?

Tupac Shakur Sanctions

As the United States and the European Union pile sanctions on Putin for annexing Crimea, Russian politicians are laughing them off – apparently while listening to Tupac Shakur.

In Moscow, sanctioned Russian officials mocked the White House’s announcement that the U.S. was going to impose costs on Russia for making military moves in Ukrainian territory. Turns out freezing assets and banning travel visas don’t do much to discourage Putin’s top aides.

Vladislav Surkov, a top Putin advisor and one of the eleven Russian and Ukrainian officials slapped with White House sanctions, declared that he’s “proud” to have made the sanctions list, equating it to a “political Oscar from America for a best supporting actor”.

“The only things that interest me in the U.S. are Tupac Shakur, Allen Ginsberg and Jackson Pollock,” Surkov told a Russian newspaper. “I don’t need a visa to access their work. I lose nothing.”

Allen Ginsberg the gay, peace loving hippy poet? And Tupac Shakur? Did 90s music just hit Russia? Maybe next year they’ll get the Notorious B.I.G.

Putin, Putin, Putin, can’t you see, sometimes your Cold War tactics just hypnotize me…

Yuri Ushakov, Putin’s chief foreign policy aide, also dismissed the sanctions, saying they “are already a bore.”

“They truly cause a sense of irony and even sarcasm,” he told Interfax on Tuesday.

Dmitry Rogozin, the deputy prime minister of Russia in charge of defense (and friend of Steven Seagal!), took to Twitter to ridicule the U.S. sanctions.

“I think some prankster prepared the draft of this Act of the US President,” he wrote.

“Comrade @BarackObama, what should do those who have neither accounts nor property abroad? Or U didn’t think about it?”

Screenshot 2014-03-18 21.38.19

It remains to be seen whether the sanctions will have any impact on Russia’s plan for Crimea – but from the looks of it the answer is no. President Obama may have to resort to much more drastic measures than freezing assets and restricting visas to convince Putin to hand Crimea back to Ukraine – perhaps freezing Putin’s Facebook account?

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Current Event Cat of the Day: Between Two Ferns

Current EVent Cat - Between Two Ferns

President Barack Obama appeared on Zach Galifianakis’s mock talk show Between Two Ferns to promote the Affordable Healthcare Act website, but at least one political pundit doesn’t believe comedy should be used to promote Obamacare: Bill O’Reilly.

The heavily scripted Funny or Die video included interview questions about Obama’s legacy:

Galifianakis: “What does it feel like to be the last black president?”

Obama: “What’s it like for this to be the last time you ever talk to a president?”

And a discussion about North Ikea:

Galifianakis: “So how does it work? Do you send Ambassador Rodman to North Korea on your behalf? I read somewhere that you’d be sending Hulk Hogan to Syria. Or is that a job more for Tanya Harding?”

Obama: “He’s not our ambassador.”

The Between Two Ferns video quickly went viral, but it wasn’t well received by everyone. Fox News host Bill O’Reilly blasted the mock interview, arguing that Abe Lincoln would NEVER do a Funny or Die video.

“The Affordable Care Act is dubious, to say the least, and using a comedic website to enroll people is a little bit desperate, don’t you think?” O’Reilly said. “I mean, I’m all for PR, and if [White House Spokesman Jay] Carney wanted to go on Funny or Die, fine. But the president of the United States? All I can tell you is, Abe Lincoln would not have done it.”

Well, that’s true considering the technology wasn’t quite up to speed in the 1860s, but Lincoln was actually a known prankster with a great sense of humour – so he totally would have done a Between Two Ferns style interview.

Although O’Reilly deemed the interview “demeaning” and “a farce”, he can’t argue about its effectiveness. A government health care spokeswoman said Tuesday afternoon that 19,000 viewers of the Galifianakis video had already clicked through to visit Healthcare.gov.

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Michele Bachmann: Obama Rode To Victory On A Wave Of White Guilt

Bachmann White Guilt

Michele Bachmann has the 2016 presidential election all figured out. The former presidential hopeful believes Barrack Obama was elected president was “because of guilt” – white guilt to be exact – and that’s something Hillary Clinton just can’t compete with.

Speaking to conservative columnist Cal Thomas, Bachmann says that the “guilt” that Americans felt before electing Obama won’t benefit a female candidate for president.

“I think there was a cachet about having an African-American president because of guilt,” Bachmann said.

“People don’t hold guilt for a woman,” she added.

Apparently the white guilt was strong enough to elect Obama in 2008 and in 2012. Americans felt very guilty.

Unfortunately former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton won’t have that advantage in 2016. Not that it would matter anyway, because Bachmann, who is retiring from Congress after her current term, insists America “isn’t ready for a woman president” – a fact that she realized after running for president in 2012.

While voters will vote for women for every other elected office in the country, Bachmann doesn’t “think there is a pent-up desire” to see a woman in the Oval Office – especially one who is “the godmother of Obamacare” and “has a real problem when it comes to Benghazi”.

Plus, after having spent two decades in the public eye, Bachmann feels Clinton just won’t have the appeal that Obama first did. When Obama came along, she said, he was “new and different” (read: not white), Clinton… not so much.

As crazy as Michele Bachmann sounds, she is right about one thing – some women just aren’t fit to be president. Bachmann being the prime example…

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Current Event Cat of the Day: State of the Union Recap

Current Event Cat - State of the Union

State of the Union recap: Obama spoke, Biden smiled, Boehner did his best grumpy cat impression.

Obama made is through his fifth annual State of the Union address last night, touching on five key points:

Income inequality: Noting that America is growing, but only for a few, Obama pledged to offer “a set of concrete, practical proposals to speed up growth, strengthen the middle class, and build new ladders of opportunity into the middle class”.

Screw You Congress: Obama promised to tackle economic inequality “with or without Congress,” signaling that he’s willing to bypass the stubborn bunch whenever and wherever possible. He also announced he will unilaterally raise the minimum wage for new federal contract staff.

Let Obamacare Be Great: Obama reiterated that Obamacare is here to stay and kindly asked Republicans to stop trying to repeal his signature healthcare overhaul. “Let’s not have another forty-something votes to repeal a law that’s already helping millions of Americans.”

Iran is My New BFF: Obama praised Iran for cooperating (to an extent) in regards to their nuclear weapons program. The president urged Congress to give it some more time and stop demanding new sanctions be placed on Iran.

 Sgt. Cory Remsburg Is Awesome and That’s Something We Can All Get Behind: Obama ended his speech by praising the military and saluting Sgt. Remsburg, an Army Ranger who was nearly killed by a bomb during his tenth deployment. Moral of the story: If Cory can recover, so can America – if Congress butts out that is…

But the best part of the State of the Union speech didn’t involve Obama at all, it was Joe Biden and John Boehner’s opposing facial expressions.  To the left of Obama, he have Joe Biden, smiling, animated, possibly drunk, and overall loving the speech. On the other side, there’s Tan Dad John Boehner. Aside from one friendly thumbs up, the perpetually orange House Speaker, who is darker than Obama at this point, looked like he’d rather watch paint dry than listen to a second more of Obama’s ramblings.

SOTU Gif

Via: BBC News

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Current Event Cat of the Day: State of the Union Address

Current Event Cat - Income Inequality State of the Union Address

It’s that time of year again: State of the Union Address Day! Tonight President Obama will address income inequality in his annual State of the Union Address and announce his executive move to increase the government minimum wage.

President Obama plans to stick it to Congress by bypassing them and using his executive powers to increase the minimum wage from $7.25 to $10.10 an hour for workers on new government contracts. Unfortunately for most minimum wage employees, this only applies to janitors, construction workers and others working for federal contractors. So the measure will only really benefit a few hundred thousand workers – at most.

“Hardworking Americans—including janitors and construction workers—working on new federal contracts will benefit from the Executive Order,” the White House said in a statement.

Obama will also call on Congress to pass legislation to raise the federal minimum wage from $7.25 to $10.10 an hour for the nearly 21 million non-government employees making minimum wage – because calling on Congress is almost as good as bypassing Congress altogether. Plus it worked out so well last year when Obama asked Congress (in his State of the Union Address) to raise the minimum wage for all workers, only to watch Republicans tear the legislation to pieces, arguing it would hurt businesses, stifle job creation, and destroy America.

But at the very least, Obama’s new executive order underscores an increased willingness to ignore Congress and get some legislation passed. After all, he only has three years left!

“You can be sure that the president fully intends to use his executive authority to use the unique powers of the office to make progress on economic opportunity, to make progress in the areas that he believes are so important to further economic growth and further job creation,” Jay Carney, the White House press secretary, told reporters on Monday.

Aside from income inequality, long-term joblessness, expansion of early childhood education and infrastructure spending are also on the State of the Union agenda.

rubio-waterAnd don’t forget to stay tuned to the Republican rebuttal! This year the GOP is doing things a bit differently by having several Republicans address Obama’s speech instead of the traditional single voice. I guess they learned a thing or two after Marco Rubio’s mini water bottle gaffe went viral. Anyways, Congresswoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers of Washington State will deliver the official response on behalf of the Republican Party but Kentucky Senator Rand Paul will release a taped address and Utah Senator Mike Lee will offer a response on behalf of the populist, anti-tax tea party movement.

Via: New York Times

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