The Kremlin Switches to Typewriters in a Fool-Proof Plan to Avoid Security Leaks

Kremlin Typewriter

In response to all the NSA spying / Wikileaks hoopla, the Kremlin has decided to go back in time to a period where hackers didn’t exist: the age of the typewriter.

The Federal Guard Service (FSO), which is in charge of safeguarding Kremlin communications as well as protecting President Vladimir Putin, is in the market to buy a number of electric typewriters. The old-timey approach is in direct response to recent worldwide spying revelations. Russians are beginning to think that using computers to prepare top-secret documents may no longer be safe.

“After scandals with the distribution of secret documents by WikiLeaks, the exposes by Edward Snowden, reports about Dmitry Medvedev being listened in on during his visit to the G20 summit in London, it has been decided to expand the practice of creating paper documents,” an unnamed source from the Federal Guard Service said.

Now none of Russia’s secrets will ever get out! Except for those that come from unnamed sources at the FSO…

But why stop there? Why not throw out all the Kremlin telephones and opt for Kremlin carrier pigeons? I’d like to see a leaker hack into a pigeon. Actually, I would not – there would be a lot of blood and feathers…

Meanwhile NSA leak Edward Snowden is in week three of being stuck in legal limbo at the transit zone of a Moscow airport. And now that the Russians are switching to typewriters, it might take until year three for any official communication to come his way. I hope he likes airport food…

Via: The Telegraph

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