Uzbekistan Bans Songs That Don’t Praise Uzbekistan

Gulnara Karimova uzbekistan

Uzbekistan has issued a nationwide ban on “meaningless” songs that fail to “praise the motherland”.

In a statement on its website, Uzbekistan’s Culture and Sports Ministry has announced a ban on “meaningless” songs that fail to “praise the motherland.” Five pop acts in particular have been banned from performing live for failing to sing songs that praise the country. The performers had their licenses revoked by the national culture agency, Uzbeknavo, because their songs were deemed “meaningless from musical and lyrical standpoints” and “lack artistic value”. Ouch! Uzbeknavo is a tougher critic than Simon Cowell.

Says the ministry:

“Their songs do not conform to our nation’s cultural traditions, they contradict our moral heritage and mentality. We should not forget about our duty to praise our motherland, our people, and their happiness.”

Seven other performers were issued “harsh warnings” and given a tight deadline to get their acts together and eliminate what the ministry called their “creative shortcomings.”

Here’s one song idea to help them improve their shortcomings:

Uzbekistan greatest country in the world.

All other countries are run by little girls.

Uzbekistan number one exporter of potassium.

Other countries have inferior potassium!

Wait a minute… Kazakhstan is the number one exporter of potassium! Uzbekistan has nothing!

Are any pop stars free from the iron fist of authoritarian Uzbek President Islam Karimov? Just one: his daughter! Gulnara Karimova (aka Googoosha, aka Uzbekistan’s most hated person) is not subject to the performance ban. The “glamourous socialite”, who also moonlights as a fashion designer and a diplomat (?), is struggling to make something of her music career. Apparently things weren’t going so well so she needed her father to ban all other pop stars. Not a bad strategy…

But does her latest music video (featuring Gerard Depardieu) comply with the nation’s cultural traditions? If Uzbekistan’s cultural traditions involve a heavy dose of auto-tune and a half-naked man writhing in a chair, then yes!

According to Human Rights Watch, President Islam Karimov’s regime consistently ranks among the world’s most brutal and repressive dictatorships, with an “atrocious” human rights record that includes prison torture, persecution of religious believers and lack of free speech – and now lack of free lyrics.

Via: The Guardian

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